The Muppets, Jason Segel, and Budweiser

Recently I saw the latest incarnation of the Muppets movie franchise, recently done by Disney and Jason Segel, an actor/writer who really seems to have been a force behind the proceedings.

Overall I liked the movie and thought Segel did a masterful job of bringing a child-like enthusiasm and wonder to the project, as well as a good sampling of savvy jokes and quality writing to keep the whole thing from being no more than an after-school special. Its one big shortcoming is that its core narrative arc — a boy who doesn’t realize he is a muppet, but eventually does and finds his true self — is far too dominant and morose at times.

There are two additional things that jumped out at me and that I thought you might find interesting.

The first is the deficiency of Jason Segel’s moves during dance sequences, which I would not have noticed except for the fact that I recently discovered the absolute brilliance of Dick Van Dyke in the movie Mary Poppins. I am too young to have known of Dick Van Dyke’s work in films such as this one (I knew he had a self-titled television show, but not much more) and was shocked to see the artistry he displayed in scenes like this:

This was no ordinary bit of dancing, it was a sublime fusion of physical skill, power, and yet lightness in a sweeping, running choreography that qualifies as true spectacle. Incidentally, I practice martial arts and getting one’s body to move like that requires extraordinary strength and endurance, not to mention years of repetition and practice. Is it fair that I found Segel’s dance numbers to be far below this standard? Of course not, but what a difference.

My second observation concerns the newly introduced muppet into the muppet cast of characters. His name is Walter and he looks like this:

Walter’s look was a subject of much planning and scrutiny by the muppet movie creators. What I find interesting is that they ended up with an extraordinarily bland-looking character, which reminds of what Budweiser did with its flagship beer brand in the early 20th century. The goal then, as now, in much of commerce was to appeal to as wide a mass of people as possible. If you visit Budweiser’s headquarters and museum showcasing its history, you will read in the company’s own words how they took strongly flavored regional beers of the era and watered them down and down for the flavor of Budweiser until its taste would offend no one and appeal to just about everyone. This is not my criticism of the beer: Budweiser itself not only admits as much, but proudly states it in its company literature.

Similarly, I see in Disney’s construction of “Walter” a similar watering-down of muppet features, almost to the point of absurdity. Compare him to the rest of the muppet cast in the photo above and it’s quite clear that we’ve got a bland product on our hands, and it is no doubt by design in the realm of commerce uber alles. This quote by one of the creators supports my contention:

“We wanted a simple character who was pure innocence and pure enthusiasm as an entry point for kids who aren’t necessarily as familiar with the Muppets as their parents,” Mr. Stoller said. 

An “entry point“…I would ask Mr. Stoller what exactly was the “entry point” of a talking frog (Kermit, the old and new star of the movies) when the franchise achieved blockbuster status in the 1980s?

This watering-down to create an “entry point” is unfortunate and unnecessary given the success of the muppet franchise during the Jim Henson era. These creatures look quite bizarre, and yet that has been their core appeal.

I also suspect another sinister force at play in this decision and one that is not about commerce so much as today’s style of parenting: the desire of modern parents to spare their children any discomfort at all by homogenizing all of their experiences. Mr. Stoller’s comment sounds very much in keeping with the (destructive) notion that children cannot embrace things unless they come completely free of any risks. This mindset is destroying a generation of young Americans by creating a false sense of safety in a world that surely must qualify as one of the most violent in the universe. The acquisition of the self-knowledge that one can survive the strange and the uncomfortable, and even enjoy it, should be one of the key goals of child-evolution into adulthood.

So pulling a Budweiser with Walter was a weak move, fellas.

But The Muppets is not a bad bit of movie-muppet nostalgia all things considered, so bravo Jason. And you better hit the gym, pal.